Friday, April 19, 2013

Bodily Harm

Hello friends,
So, LWBAM is something that affects me in my everyday routine. Oh, btw, I just got done pumping iron again. I worked in some new lifts that I made up. I've never seen them incorporated in a gym setting before, but as you, fellow reader, will come to find out, I don't give away many of my secrets. I'm listening to some sweet tunes as I type this, (anything to keep the blood flowing is a good thing for me.) So I decided to discuss with you some of the problems that I encounter throughout my day LWBAM. At a glance, one might not think I have many issues, but I do. For example, last night I awoke at 4am because I was having trouble breathing. I was on my stomach, and my face was in my biceps. I was being suffocated by my giant biceps! That is one reason I never fall asleep on my stomach. Sometimes, I have trouble getting shirts on. I mean, they look fine on my muscular body, but I have had to turn many of my favorite polo shirts into tank tops after ripping the sleeves as I picked up my backpack or held the door open for an elderly lady. Just this morning, I was about five minutes late for my class, and I was rushing to get into the room. I opened the door, and I felt like poor young Hercules after his destructive game of frisbee. I swung open the door apparently a bit too hard, causing a tennis ball size hole in the wall of my classroom. I just can't get a break! I saw some kids hiding smirks and giggles, but I ignored them. Everyone knows that they just want you to react. After that incident, I decided to go back to my room to get in a few reps before my next class. Any spare time I have, I feel like I need to have something heavy in my hand, completing repetitive curls. More than once I have borrowed backpacks, end tables, and the occasional love-seat to curb my hunger for hypertrophy. Once you get bitten by the iron bug, it stays with you forever. Which reminds me... sometimes people try to see me flex. I don't try to let them, but they have their tricks. For instance, lunchtime is a time I have to be careful. Holding a lunch tray places one's arms in a naturally flexed position, and as soon as I pick up my lunch tray, I avoid this problem by holding it between my legs. Two or three times bright flashes have gone off as I got my lunch. Someone told me it was just lightning...but it was winter. Whatever. Those kind of things come with the territory.
Shoutout to my new reader from Norway! Hei venner! Velkommen til min blogg side! Du er høyt elsket!
Also, comment on my posts if you have any requests for upcoming topics. I'm always open to feedback!

Thursday, April 18, 2013

Swelling Up

Hello Friends,
Well today, I decided to google some youtube videos to give the old bi's and tri's a sweat inducing workout. I found a suitable one, and soon the sound of metal plates hitting against one another echoed throughout my room. After some much needed hammer curls and isolated bicep curls, I decided to finish it off with a protein shake. As Arnold Swarthzgginarger once said "You can never have too much hypertrophy!" That man is my hero. I usually enjoy working out in the privacy of my room, because usually when I hit the gym, nobody gets anything done. They all just stop what they're doing and watch me. So for the sake of their own health, I decided to become what I like to call, a "hermit lifter." Most people don't know about my obsession with fitness and the muscular system of my own body. The few times that I venture outside of my dwelling, I have people asking me "How are your arms so big??" and "Dang brotha, you got some sick pipes!" and the occasional "Can I just kiss your bicep? Just one kiss, I won't even ask for a picture."

There's nothing wrong with that, but it gets old after a while. People ask me what my secret is. Is it genetics? Is it a special program I do?  Were you always able to support St. Bernards on your biceps? And I tell them that I have no idea what I did to deserve this. The Good Lord blesses some people with children; He blessed me with big biceps. LWBAM is hard, but I have found my niche.

Shoutout to my followers from Deutshland! Ich begrüße Sie zu den Staaten!



Setting Sail

So this is my blog about life with big arm muscles. I have found that my day to day routine is greatly affected by my arm muscles, and sometimes they get me into trouble! But that's ok. Come join me as I travel through this world, Living with Big Arm Muscles (LBAM)